An attitude adjustment has been necessary for some time now. I’ve noticed that I linger on things, harbor them inside for a long time which causes me who knows how much stress and anxiety. In the end all this does is make me sicker. Do I need or want sicker? No thank you!
So my attitude adjustment comes via realizing that my mother is 79 years old, my oldest daughter will soon be 22 and is getting married next year, my other daughter is almost 10 and my life is flashing before my eyes. Instead of focusing on the hurtful things I want to put my energy into the loving moments and create more of them.
I’ve begun to find small ways to be more kind to my family. I believe that I am more caring and considerate of other people than the dearest and most loved people in my life. It was an easy habit for me to get into. I always try to smile and not complain about things but when I’m home or talking on the phone to family and friends, I let it all go. They hear all about my problems, how much I hurt and I feel it’s acceptable to get angry with them because they love me and should understand.
As tough as this is, I’m trying my best to stop. I’ve asked my husband to call me out on it when I start. If I’m not happy about something I can quietly talk to him about it but not let him take the brunt of everything. I do need an outlet for my feelings so I plan on using my blog, or a journal, prayer and as I said talking over things with family, but not barraging them with complaints.
I feel better already just recognizing this and wanting to work on it.